MindWind

As he floated into the abyss, he only thought of one thing. The one emotion he always treasured. The one thought that mattered:

Love.

He barely had energy to work his console. He checked the battery and oxygen levels. It was devastatingly low. The warning lights flashed. He had silenced the alarms that told him over and over about his impending doom. If he is to die here alone in space, he wanted to die in peace.

Around him he could see the innumerable stars that lit up the sky. The earth too, was among them somewhere out there. But which direction he did not know. And how far away was also a mystery.

Why him, of all people. Why did he have to volunteer? Was the exploration of a time space anomaly floating just outside of the solar system worth risking the one life he had to live? What about his wife? What about his only child?

And now it had carried him across the universe, maybe millions of star systems away. Contact cut off from home. Oxygen running low. He had drifted here for months, looking for a way home.

He sighed. Love bound him to the ones he called most precious. Yet unlike the movies, the universe did not care about love. Love was a human construct. An emotion given a name whose sole purpose was to ensure reproduction and the survival of the species.

He began to feel his world darken around him. The oxygen must have run out. Even the warning lights seemed dimmer now. The stars too. He slowed his breathing down, savoring the last gulps of oxygen his body could consume. The last gulps of life that he held so precious.

It was almost gone now, the world around him. Only his thoughts seemed to drift in and out of his mind. Yet he felt his love for his wife and child as intensely as never before. But the universe did not care about love. For love was a human construct. Its purpose was reproduction and the survival of the species.

The blackness of death enveloped him. The reaper engulfed him in its pitch black shroud. He felt nothing. No pain. No discomfort. Just a sensation of nothingness. There was darkness but it was not cold.

In the furthest distance he could see a pinprick of white light. Was this the proverbial light in the end of the tunnel? He did not know. But all he could do was to effortlessly drift towards it. And through it all, even though he physically felt nothing, he could still feel that one emotion that never ceased to be. Love. But the universe did not care about love. Right?

The light became brighter and larger. Yes, indeed it seemed to be a an opening leading out of a vast tunnel. He drifted through this tunnel, his mind now a cacophony of thoughts and memories of his wife and child.

And suddenly, with no warning, life embraced him in its warm light. There was pain. There was agony. There was a struggle to breathe. He cried. His own voice sounded muffled and alien to him.  The series of events that followed were incoherent. There was a sensation of drowning. Then a sensation of being pushed. Then more pain. More sounds. More chaos.

In this incoherence, time was lost. Yet that one emotion that never seemed to go away lingered behind. His wife and child. He wanted to be with them. To protect them. He still felt his love burn within him like a cinder. Yet the universe did not care about love. Love was a human construct.

She felt tears in her eyes as she held his photograph. It’s been almost two years since they lost him. There was no hope, she was told. The anomaly had engulfed his craft and they had lost all contact. The governments were reluctant to fund a search and rescue operation. He knew the risks. So did his team. So did she. But did her little boy know? All he wanted was his father back.

How she wished he was here to see this. Their son, happily playing with the new puppy they rescued from the shelter. It was a strange story, how they found this little puppy purely by accident while passing by a random shelter, and feeling a random need to go look inside. Maybe she wanted a distraction from the pain. Maybe she thought it would be a good idea for her son one too. Maybe that was all it was because the moment they both saw this puppy running towards them they knew they had to bring him home.

There was something in his eyes. A sense of recognition. A sense of relief. A sense of love.

Could it be love? But how could he love people he had never met? Was this love born of his need to find a home? Was it born of his need to be safe?

Can dogs really feel love? Because love is a human construct. The universe doesn’t care about love.. right?

And yet when she sees the puppy look at her or her son, she can feel it in her heart. She can see it in his little eyes. That feeling of wanting to protect them. The feeling of family, warmth, happiness and all the good things in life. Every time she looked in those little eyes she felt a little happier. She felt loved.

Is love a human construct? Does the universe care about love?

Or is it the very thread that binds us from one life to the next?

image credits: UA magazine

~ by Prageeth Thoradeniya on October 9, 2017.

Posted in Short story