Well, our next Prime Minister might be a Volkswagen, definitely not a Lamborghini.

Although there are many Sri Lankans working in Italy, the Italians are not in this except through that other group, the Vatican, and that is now Argentine.

We are reading about self-driving cars.   Tracks are being laid and cars are being tested in Europe and the US. There is no need to sit in front and turn the steering wheel to guide the car. You can if you want to, but it does not turn the front wheels. That happens on its own. Technology! Next we will have a self-flushing toilet. What? We have is already? The age of machines is upon us, smart phones, it calls you, you don’t have to call it. Robots work away in factories, no overtime no Pee breaks, no unions! And cloud computing. No more will parents sneer at their offspring saying “you got your head in the clouds” and have to fend the retort, “well, where do you store your digital content duffer dad, oh the limp disk?”.

We are also reading about the coming Jobs Wars,[1] wars that will change the locations where jobs will become available, their quantities and the types of jobs.  And with it will change human geography, where people are able to live with law and order, decent public services, government that works, well doesn’t work overtime for itself that it. We went through the Hubs episode, remember that one, Here a Hub there a Hub, every where a Hubbub!   Knowledge Hub, Aviation Hub, Logistics Hub, Financial Hub, Tourism Hub. No Hubs yet.

Now comes the Hub Cap! The present Prime Minister promises, they all promise don’t they, he says that he will create one million jobs and Volkswagens. The world’s largest auto maker will set up in Sri Lanka and make Volkswagens, none of these micro assemblies for us, real sturdy German cars. Not bad, I hope they have good Hub Caps.

But why not go the whole hog and get for us a self-driving Volkswagen Prime Minister!

This automation in not a simple matter. It will come at us fast and unlike the Tsunami wave it will go over the entire country. Then there is the Loon thing. Yes, Loon what Google is experimenting in New Zealand, the Balloon based wireless service to cover the whole of Sri Lanka. This is some years ahead of us. By the time the experiment is over Malaysian Airlines may halt its flights over this part of the country. Since their airplanes have a tendency to be irredeemably lost the Loons may not make much of a difference for them anyway. Many bats and crows may come to naught in the planned scheme of the network of the flying wireless Internet service.

Meanwhile, the pols have already discounted the Loon and cashed in on the benefit, announcing that it is coming soon, and that they are responsible for covering the country with wireless when their opponents couldn’t even cover a part of the Colombo city with Batshit! Such is the currency of politics! When in doubt fly a trial balloon, taking a page from the weathermen.

Getting back to automation, the present PM is in some ways a kind of an autopilot. He has seen the tea leaves (they are un-plucked because Meenakshi wants a higher wage) and decided that China is not the way to go, that short-term benefit is definitely to go the way of the West.

Ranil appears to see himself in a heroic frame, a Lochinvar[2] come to the rescue of fair (kind of dusky) maiden Sri Lanka almost wed to the Yellow Peril.

The task it is daunting the risk great by far

But nothing will stay the hand of young Lochinvar…

….And so forth, as Ranil goes about arranging for the people’s Prime Minister, the Volkswagen!  But where will Ranil – Lochinvar go with the fair (Dusky) maiden, she can’t leave? Is he arranging for someone else… no! Not that! There is a nasty word for that kind of thing. Lochinvar didn’t do that! He rode away with the bride! He didn’t steal her to be sold to some White Slavers!   He was honorable!

Well so is Ranil (Ra-Blue)!

But the Germans are likely to see the situation clearly and see far into their future advantage. China is expected to be a larger part of the world economy by 2030 than the US ever was. The tide it is a turning, the times they are a changing and the Middle Kingdom is coming to its own and we, we are after Loons and Volkswagens?

No bracelets, no chewing gum no lap tops, not even anyone to sit on their laps. Not this time. This time it is a million jobs and Volkswagens-R-us!

There is one thing one can say about Sri Lankans they are serious about the Loon. Ranil is very likely to be the next Prime Minister of Sri Lanka. But might we consider changing him for a Volkswagen? As he promises this country will be awash with Volkswagens, we will be selling them to the Chinese from here. The Indians? I am not sure they too may like the Volkswagens. A million jobs are more than all the non housemaids working outside Sri Lanka. Will they leave their jobs in the desert sands and come home to the Volkswagen?

You know they might, they should. After all, here in Sri Lanka they can see green leaves, eat Waraka and drink ethanol.

So the EU and the Americans may have done good for themselves. You know, they will say, over in Sri Lanka we are experimenting with an automatic self drive PM, the first of its kind.

And Sri Lankans will be joyous, and we are the first in the world!

Watch out!

[1] Clifton, Jim, The Coming Jobs Wars, Gallup 2011

[2] Remember the poem Lochinvar by Sir Walter Scott? If you don’t read it here, http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/183947   serious story, the hit movie The Graduate was based on it, really? Well not quite.