Supermoms: To be or not to be??

whizpen ♦ January 28, 2014 ♦ 2 Comments

According to the dictionary, a supermom is a mother who successfully manages a home and brings up children while also having a full time job. The number of these so called “supermoms” has multiplied during the past few decades including in our little Sri Lanka. A fast moving world, directed media and financial constraints due to the high costs of living has, willingly or unwillingly spurred women to be these moms. The glorified image of such mothers in newspapers and magazines liken them to superhumans with multiple hands, multi- tasking many children around. Being a mother of two, with my youngest being just 3weeks old, is this what I really want to be??

                 Despite having had a full time job after completing my studies, I quit the month before my first baby was born. A stupidity and a waste of good education according to some of my colleagues, but not for a moment have I regretted my decision. I manage a home by myself and bring up my children (successfully I hope), but had I not resigned my job maybe I would have been called a supermom….which is the last thing I want to be.

               My children need me when they are growing up, and not when they are grown. After they are older and become more independent they would be needing my advice and my guidance, not my help or support. Until the age of five, the brain of a child develops at a very fast rate and during this time period I can instill within them a good character, values and manners ,also including healthy food habits,. Little things that decide their future .And how could I, during this crucial time in my children’s lives, not be for them? And how can I allow the future and the character of my babies to be shaped by domestic aids, old aunties, daycare centres, or grandparents who tend to spoil kids much more than would be best for them -all of whom I would be forced to leave my children with had I been employed.

                     On the other hand, if you happen to be a single mother, then there would be no choice but to take a job leaving your children with someone else. But just make sure that it would be someone completely trustworthy. And make sure that your job is within the country- don’t be foolish enough to go overseas leaving your children to the mercy of others consoling yourself that it is for their best. You may end up losing your children and destroying their futures forever. Better still, get yourself an online job. Its flexible with timing and you also get to keep an eye on your children.

                       One cannot however deny that there are those exceptional women or rather human machines who with their perfect time management have well kept homes and well looked after children and a successful job. But one wonders how far they are able to cater to the emotional and psychological requirements of their families. Can they keep their children happy and their spouses satisfied at the same time?……..or are they humans too?  

               Ofcourse, this might sound like the bigoted ideologies of a narrow minded housewife willingly suppressing herself within the four walls of her household, but this perhaps is the humble ambitions of a simple homemaker striving, not to balance many jobs to the approving nods of feminists, but to achieve a home, harmonious and happy.