Stories of the Wind

It was Valentine’s Day. While the rest of the world was celebrating love, and the number of umbrellas in Galle Face increased exponentially, Shavin was thoroughly disgusted just by the idea of love. He was tired of it. He walked into a restaurant, hoping to get rid of the depression at least by filling his stomach.

Exactly a year ago, he would have been the happiest man on planet Earth, because he was with the girl of his dreams. But within a year, interestingly the girl of his dreams had turned into his worst nightmare. Today, Shavin was lonely, depressed and in need of someone to talk to. He sat down at the only table that had a few empty seats. There was an elderly man seated right opposite at the table, who offered him a smile as he sat down.

He didn’t know if it was that welcoming smile, or whether it was his desperation to talk to someone, but within minutes he was pouring out his heart and soul to the old man. He told him almost everything that had happened within the year, starting from the amazing moments he had with his girlfriend to the more recent terrible experiences with her. The old man listened with a smile that suggested that he knew exactly what the youngster was talking about. Finally, after listening to the entire account, the old man began his story.

“I have struggled for many years to understand love. What is it, really? Is it merely a feeling, that fluctuates all the time or is it something more than that? Let me tell you my story – the story of the girl with curls.”

Shavin did not quite expect a story from the old man, and he was a bit taken aback.   Since he did not have anything better to do, he decided to listen to the old man/’s story … The old man continued:

“I met her for the first time at a musical event, in which I was performing. She was one of those girls who came up to me after my performance and told me  that ‘I have an amazing voice’. And we exchanged email addresses, and then she left. This was at a time when Facebook was not invented, and not everyone carried mobile phones. I remember though, admiring her hair – they were the prettiest curls I had ever seen.

“For a few months after our first meeting, we kept in touch through email. Sometimes we called each other. And soon enough, I knew that we shared something special. We met a few times after that, and each meeting would leave me more convinced that I was falling in love with her. We were not good at keeping in touch, but the absence of contact only made the feelings more real and more tangible. Before long, I knew that I was in love with the girl with curls”

Typical love story, Shavin thought, but didn’t say it out loud. What would an ancient man, who lived in an era where arranged marriages were the fashionable thing to do, know about the problems lovers face today?

“When I was in my final years of High School, I met a new girl – a shy girl who did not talk much” the old man continued. Shavin was a bit surprised by the sudden shift in the story, but still didn’t say anything.

“I knew that she liked me, but she was not very vocal about it. We would meet, we would talk over the phone, but most of the time it would be me talking, and she would just listen. At first, I found it cute and very attractive, but as time went on it became a bit tiring. In fact, during the few months leading to my final exams, she would not talk to me at all, because she believed talking would affect my studies. But the silence only made me more miserable. Sometimes, I would sit down and think about how much I missed the girl with curls, that girl who walked up to me confidently and initiated conversation. And at those times, I would be convinced that I truly loved the girl with curls”

Shavin was a bit confused. He wanted to ask what happened to the girl with curls. But, decided to let the old man explain himself.

“A year after I graduated from High School, during my gap year I met another girl, a very different girl – an outgoing girl. She was almost the complete opposite to the shy girl. She would drag me along to parties, and would want to hang out all the time. We would go for movies, plays, concerts and almost every other event that was in the calendar. We’ll go out shopping, and I would be waiting near a TV watching the match, while she would visit every shop in the mall, and come back empty-handed and complaining about the poor selection of clothes and accessories. Though at first I enjoyed the social life, and the outings, slowly I started wanting more time for myself. And sometimes I would think about the girl with curls, and would miss the quiet times we spent, just talking over the phone, or the periodic outings we had, when each and every outing had meant something. And at those times, I would be convinced more than ever, that I truly loved the girl with curls.

“After my gap year, I went away to USA to pursue my undergraduate studies. It was during this time that I found myself in a long distance relationship with a girl so different, and more mature than the outgoing girl – an understanding girl. I would rarely ever find enough time to talk with her, within my busy schedule- juggling undergrad studies and a part-time job at the campus. But every call  why, even the simple text messages we exchanged would mean a lot to me. In the middle of stressful college life, her understanding nature was a great comfort. But, the thing I missed the most in the long distance relationship was the touch, the hugs and the moments together. Sometimes, I would think about the girl with curls and would miss her touch, and the moments we shared together in person. And I would once again be convinced that I truly was in love with the girl with curls”

Shavin was getting a bit annoyed now. The man wasn’t making much sense, and he knew that with age and senility, people could lose their grip on reality. Was he talking to a mad man?

“When I returned from USA, it was only a matter of time before I met a new girl, fell in love and got married. This girl was slightly more on the possessive side. She wanted to spend time with me all the time, and wanted to come everywhere I went. She was different to the understanding girl, and kept reminding me that marriage was a deeper level of commitment. She wanted to know everything about me, all the finer details, all my friends and all my little secrets. At first, the possessiveness was cute, and I felt excited and relieved to share my entire life with someone. But, there were these times when I would miss my bachelor lifestyle, and I would remember the girl with curls, and the freedom I had with her to do as I pleased. And those moments would have me convinced again, that I was helplessly in love with the girl with curls.”

Shavin was losing the little respect he had for the old man’s age. He started working out in his head, how he was going to respond to the old man. He couldn’t believe that he let this man, who clearly was either out of his mind or a complete freak, advice him on love. But while he worked out his response, he let the old man continue.

“A few years into the marriage, I found myself married to a new woman, a very different woman. This time it is a woman because she was too old to be categorized as a girl” The old man chuckled to himself, and then continued. “This woman, who was also the mother of two, was very different to the possessive wife I had. She was more concerned about her children, their studies, their future and their well-being, than she was about me. I enjoyed that at first, because I was also very fond of the children and cared greatly about them. But sometimes, I missed getting all the attention for myself and during those moments I would miss the girl with curls…..”

“That’s enough”, Shavin almost barked. “I’ve had enough of your nonsense! How could you do that to your wife? And to all the other girls, for that matter? If you really loved the girl with curls, you should have just married her! Why would you allow all those women into your life and then tell me that you love the girl with curls? I don’t think you have the right to talk about love! Not that I do, but compared to you I think I am better off!”

A smile crept across the old man’s face.

“I did” he said.

“You did what?” barked Shavin.

“I did marry the girl with curls!”

Shavin was confused. He looked at the old man, who smiled back with a twinkle in his eyes.

“I know you are confused son. Let me explain. Look out there on the other side of the road, and you would see my girl with curls, walking here to join me for lunch.”

Shavin looked outside. He saw an elderly lady, with pretty little white curls, walking towards the restaurant.

“She is my girl with curls, my angel, and the girl of my dreams. But she is also the shy girl, the outgoing girl, the understanding girl, the possessive girl, the wife and the mother. She is all of them. See, true love is not the expectation that the girl of your dreams will always be the same. True love is the ability to always see the ‘girl of your dreams’  despite all the changes that happen over time. People change with time, and sometimes those changes can make them appear completely different, just like the shy girl is almost completely different to the mother of two. Love is not expecting everything to be the perfect fairytale story, but it is the courage to deal with the changes and to accept them, and through all those changes continue to keep sight of that person whom you truly fell in love with. The more I think about it, I begin to see that the changes were not only in her, but it was also in me. We have both changed, we have  both matured and we have  grown into each other. Love is not a feeling, not a moment. It is a decision, a commitment and a process of growth. Today, despite the fact that the curls have gone from  velvet black to snow white, despite the fact that her skin is wrinkled and her eyes have sunken,  and all the other changes I can still see in her ‘the girl with curls’ that I first fell in love with. We live separated now, because we don’t want to be a burden to our children. I live with  son, and she lives with our daughter. But every Valentine’s Day we meet and spend it together. And I look forward to that day throughout the whole year”.

Shavin dropped his spoon. He was speechless. He looked down, and then he looked up and watched as the elderly lady walked in. Everything he heard just swiveled in his mind and finally settled into place. He looked at the old man, who grinned like a little school boy all excited at seeing the lady. The old man looked back at Shavin and said with a wink in his eye, “Now if you will excuse me, young sir, I have a date with my girl with curls”.

Shavin paid for his meal, got up and left. He didn’t know the name of the old man, or who he was, but he knew that the story he had just heard would change his idea of love forever.

 (Published with the author’s permission. The story first appeared in print last month, in the ‘Colomboo’ magazine)